AFTER MATT CAIN: JUNE 13, 2012 Back

My wife,

(Smarter than I), says,

"If the bat hit the ball,

Then how is that perfect?"

– Well, he didn't strike out every guy,

27 guys;

No one can do that;

"Also, not every ball was a strike, right?"

She concludes,

"That is not perfect";

 

But in baseball,

2430 games a year,

27 up, 27 down happens

Less frequently,

Than presidential elections;

 

(Though, post-steroids,

We've had 6 in the past 3 years

– I'm counting Armando Gallaraga's,

The "safe" call made

At first base by temporarily-blinded

Umpire Jim Joyce);

 

Honey, darling, casual watcher,

I do apologize:

For not,

Putting away the dishes,

In their exact, correct places;

For getting the wrong kid of trash bags;

For various smells and emanations;

For not throwing away my torn college sweatshirt;

 

But it's as close to perfect,

As my game and I,

Can get.